As I've said on the blog - a LOT is going on in my life right now. The major thing being that we've bought a supermarket and are thus moving to a whole new town in January. This means our house is on the market and I'm trying to pack and organise removalist quotes as well as work out what needs to be done and action it to make our new place liveable at least.
So last week, I made a BIG decision. I decided to stop writing for a while. I've finished my revs for Carina and am waiting for a good friend to finish reading the full before I edit and push send. I've subbed a partial to the editor I'm working with at M&B and are waiting for her response. I've stopped working on my Single Title for the time being.
I was feeling stressed when I WASN'T getting writing done and, when I realised I don't have contracts or deadlines, I thought this was STUPID, unnecessary stress. This writing stuff is supposed to be FUN!
So I thought that while so much was going on, I'd take the pressure off.
This week... I've read more! I've watched TWO movies with my husband. I've been out to dinner with girlfriends. I've played less stressfully with the kids. I've kept up to date with the washing. And it feels GOOD!
But strangely, it also feels weird. I miss having a writing project. Even thought it's only for a short time, it depresses me that I'm letting the dream slip by.
This is what happens when writer's don't write! They feel LOST!
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16 comments:
Hugs on feeling lost, Rach. but good on you for being brave enough to take a break. You're so right, writing is supposed to be fun and if you need a break to re-energise and keep the spark than your writing will probably be better off for it in the long run.
This sounds familiar :) I've had to take a few breaks too. It's sad that it always seems to be the writing that goes, although it's one of the most important things to me. One day it'll be the day job's and that'll be much more fun, won't it? :)
I know what you mean - feeling lost. I haven't written properly for MONTHS but haven't really taken a break, but have somehow found menial tasks to fill my day. I actually dont see myself writing properly till next year too.
Enjoy your reading/movie/going out/playing time -all that's important, its looking after YOU and with all that's going on, you deserve a bit of down time. My one question is - what are you doing with your Sat nights now that the bill is over?
I feel lost and guilty, and its the same when I sit and write with the kids around. Guilt, guilt, guilt. Just have to keep on juggling I suppose. Hope you have a good move, we're doing the same in Dec. Urgh.
Tam
It's a hard decision Anita - hopefully one that will make me more writing-revived in the long-term.
True Lacey! I wonder why that is!? I cannot WAIT to kick the day job but don't tell my year one's that :)
Janette - if only we could go out or go to a movie together, then this time would be MUCH better spent! x
Tam - commiserations on the move. Hope it's to a BETTER place! And that GUILT!? Don't get me started :(
Everyone's right. You need to really relax and enjoy the time not writing so you make the most of it and come back when everything's settled (or you get some cracking news) feeling good for the break!!
Hugs!!
Rachael, seriously can you come and stay at my house, my washing is seriously NOT up to date and if you could play with the kids too that would make you the perfect houseguest. In return I promise to be person who spends the most money in your supermarket, I seem to have no problems with that!
Life if for living, so have some time to enjoy yourself xx
Hey Rach,
First off I wanted to say that you got a bit of your post wrong, you're NOT letting the dream slip by, you're being practical and biding your time. It is hugely important that we remember there is a life outside of writing, despite feeling at times that our world revolves around how many words we get down, how much conflict we've covered on the page. You're doing a wonderful thing by being honest enough to admit that other things need taking care of right now and I guaranteed you'll reap the benefits. Happy home, happy kids, happy mother, these will in turn produce happy writing when you return to it.
Take your time, it's almost November already making me personally wonder where the hell 2010 has gone!
The best of luck with your new supermarket and new home, everything will settle when the time is right and you'll come back refreshed revived and raring to go!
Totally agree with Aideen. You are just in research mode and my advice is read heaps, watch heaps of movies and enjoy your children and the move (as hard as that might be...not the children, they are easy to enjoy but moves, not so much). Sometimes we get so immersed in our writing we cannot see the forest for the trees and a break can give you new perspective. It certainly did for me. A break, a new direction and I am enjoying it now more than ever. So will you. Good luck with the submissions. You will get published because you are a writer and that is what you do. But dont put a deadline on it, just enjoy the journey wherever it takes you.
Sounds like some exciting changes and challenges in your life right now, Rachael. Best of luck with the move and the new business venture.
Taking time to take care of life will hopefully give you time to fill the creative well as well. Then, when you get back to writing it will be so much fun - and more productive.
It must be a normal 'women' thing to feel guilty - guilty for writing instead of playing with the kids every second and every other second keeping a spotless house.... guilty for NOT writing and playing with the kids and having the house sparkling clean...
Ah well, at least we love our jobs!
When a writer doesn't write, they can think. Plots, how to's etc. Just because one is not actually typing away doesn't mean they are not writing. It takes more than keystrokes on a keyboard. :)
But at the same time if I don't write, that is not even thinking of how to, I feel lost, and know there is something missing.
Rach, you have to do what is best for you and sometimes that means taking a break. You have so much on your plate right now that writing may feel like you are going around in circles. So take a deep breath, take the break and come back all energised. Good luck with the move!
I know what you mean. I'm so used to sitting at the computer all the time. When I take a break from writing I'm kind of at a loss. But caution...the longer you stay away from writing, the harder it is to get back into it. Maybe instead of putting so much pressure on yourself to produce, commit to 100-200 words a day. Just to keep you in the routine. Good luck with the move!
Oh my I am so behind in responding to all your lovely comments! Thank you ALL for your support and advice - you are all very wise and wonderful women!
Wendy - you ARE definitely right. And maybe I'll just keep a journal or something for a little bit.
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